Tiny little tears in my heart.

My last night in LA. I woke up Monday morning, just another Groundhog Day, saw my friend Tam's post about another tour and TA-DA, four days later, I'm spending my last night in The Dome. Now don't fret I'll be back in June, but it hurts my heart to leave LA. I love LA. I know how to get around a good part of LA, I understand my cardinal directions of the city. I've even come to love the city's ugly step-child: air pollution. It's nasty, gross and smelly, but it's LA. I'm scared. I'm scared that I'm going to get massively homesick and I'm going to have to spend a ton of money on finding places to stay. I'm scared that the major risk I'm taking in order to pay off my debt is going to somehow put me in more debt. But everyone seems really optimistic about it, they're sure I'll find my way and meet people and I'll love it. Sometimes it's just not so easy to constantly tackle the Earth all by yourself. Thank God people have been so supportive and excited. I've been able to come to M.A.C., Yana (my internship) and the crew for My Future Girlfriend (also the creators of "We Need Girlfriends", youtube the show, they are almost at 1 million views) and they are all sad to see me go, but they are all happy for me. I hope they will receive me with open arms when I come back. I'm doing a mobile marketing tour with a marketing company out of LA, and their client is Bare Escentuals. We'll be taking on the target demographic in San Fransisco, NYC and Chicago, positively representing the label and providing product knowledge and samples for the consumer.
I've had to put an immediate halt to every thing I was doing: all of the groundwork I was laying, all of the relationships I was making, all of the jobs I was trying to get, all on pause. I prayed to God and just asked that whatever path I was supposed to take, that He just put me on that path. I didn't ask him to please let me stay here or please give me the tour, I just asked to be put in the direction that was right for me and this is what he did.
I'm trying to take everything in, not take it for granted, take in the Hills, the crazy people, the streets and the soundtrack that has made all of this my home over the past five months...
Silversun Pickups
The Toxic Airborne Event
The Pixies
Ya Boy
Mack 10
Lily Allen
Miley Cyrus (yes, shut up)
Jeremih
Band of Horses
Arcade Fire
Jay-Z
Sad Brad Smith
Radiohead
Spoon
B.O.B.
Sooo much more.
I hope to God this will be a good thing. I hope I'll be ok. I wish I could push pause on LA and have nothing change until I come back. But that won't happen. The world has to continue moving on, whether I want it to or not. I've made some fantastic friends, I love my roommates: Robbie Bear, Ganyon, Blastin and Steff. Oh and all the other nomads who flitted in and out of The Dome. The Amazing Dome. I can't wait to come back. I already miss you LA!